


One Foot in Front of the Other

by Raelae



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Father-Daughter Relationship, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-03-17
Packaged: 2018-05-27 04:56:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6270403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raelae/pseuds/Raelae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shortly after the events at the Lakeside Resort, both Ellie and Joel are still trying to recover from the events there. After a short hiatus in their travels, they finally decide they're up to moving along again. Peace and quiet has never been know to last long though, especially in this day and age. And soon, it's back to struggling to survive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Foot in Front of the Other

It had only been about a week and a half since their run in with the cannibals, and neither Joel nor Ellie were yet in the best of shape.

Joel was healing up well enough, but he was still hurting from his previous injury, and the encounter trying to get Ellie back hadn't helped him much. He was in far better shape sure, but no where near enough to keep up their all day travels. And Ellie was no different. The events had given her a real scare, and she had been alone to face them. The physical scars were fading, but the emotional ones still brewed beneath the surface. Almost every night was filled with terrible nightmares for the poor girl, and she continued to try to be brave, just curling into herself and refusing to bother him with it.

But she could only handle so much, and soon enough she made it custom to make her way over to him afterwords and curl up close to him. Never too close of course, she always kept a bit of distance between them, the same distance they always seemed to keep between each other. Or at least he had been trying to. It became clear to him over time that she longed for it, for a somewhat normal form of human contact. If she knew just how much he had really done, would she continue to reach out to him? Sure, she knew he had spent time on the other side of things, just not all he had done. Though he was sure she got a good idea of what after Pittsburgh.

After the event with the cannibals, he was faced with his own nightmares, ones he thought long buried. He shivered a bit as he thought about it, both from the memory and the cold, and he tried his best to pull his ragged coat and blanket as tightly to him as he could. It might help a bit with the bite of the cold, but not with everything he had done.

He wasn't a good man, far from it in fact. He was always known, even before all hell broke loose, to be stand-offish. It was just something he had become accustomed to being, trust was just something that had become hard for him. He supposed he had to blame his ex-wife for that. She had served him with papers and no explanation. Then she literally just walked out of their lives, left Sarah to him and asked for no sort of visitation. She was just gone, and he was left with trying to explain to his teary eyed little girl why mommy wasn't coming home, when he didn't even rightly know himself.

But he moved on, and so did Sarah. She was much better at doing so though, he was just a wreck of a man. His work load had to double just so he could keep a roof over their heads and food in their stomachs, he knew it was hard on her but she never complained. She had been a tough one. 

He...not so much. The only people he kept close were his daughter and his brother Tommy, no one else could be trusted in his eyes.

And then...like some cruel twist of fate...his world fell apart again when the outbreak happened. When his little baby girl was taken from him.

It took everything Tommy could muster just to get him moving, to get out of the area before the infected were on them. And he knew Tommy had been saying something to him the whole time, but none of it registered. He only heard the screams in the distance, and only saw his little girls lifeless eyes as he held her and begged for her not to leave him.

This was the next event that changed his life, and was the most damning.

For a while he had just gone on in a sort of daze, wandering around the triage camp and staring at the few families that had managed to stay together. The lucky ones...the people that pissed him off most in the world, even more than the infected at that point. They were happy...somewhat, because they still had each other. He had no choice but to leave his daughter out there while Tommy tried to pull them to safety.

Contempt had grown in him, contempt towards his brother for leaving Sarah out there just to be picked apart by god knows what. Contempt for the soldiers around him, for it was one of them who took his very life away. And contempt for the people who still had their children.

He had tried everything to keep his little girl safe from the cruelties of the world. He sacrificed so much in life to make sure she was safe and protected. Just what the hell had he done to deserve this? Why was she taken from him? How...why...did he fail her?

A grieving man soon turned into a cold hearted one and his life spiraled into the depths of alcohol and fights. You just had to look at him wrong and he'd bust your jaw...or worse. 

And poor Tommy had been left to try to deal with him.

But Tommy could only do so much and soon they were ordered out. They had to move to a different QZ because they just couldn't deal with him there anymore.

That's when he reached the lowest of the low. It had all been a blur to him at the time but, now things were clear at the forefront of his mind. The brutal fights, the heavy drinking, the multiple suicide attempts...and then came the hunters. He fell in with them, while Tommy started to look towards the Fireflies.

They were at odds all the time, but both continued down the paths they had chosen, growing further and further apart from each other. Eventually...they parted ways and Joel became a true monster.

He didn't like to think about his time as a hunter, but his nightmares would afford him no rest. He could see the faces of every person he killed, man, woman...didn't matter.

But then...that day happened. The one that became a turning point for him and turned him from the dark path he had set himself upon.

A group stumbled into their territory looking for supplies, it wasn't a large group but, pickings had been slim as of late so they took whatever they could get. They hunted those poor people relentlessly till only two remained.

Joel only caught up with the others just in time to catch the aftermath, and he swore his heart ceased it's beating when he did. His group surrounded a lone man who was knelt on the ground crying...cradling his bloodied deceased daughter in his arms.

Everything went in slow motion at that point as he watched their leader raise his pistol, aiming it at the distraught fathers head.

Joel acted without thinking and raised his own, tears only barely being held back as he pulled the trigger, painting the wall next to the leaders head with his brains.

The others turned on him instantly, but he was acting on pure emotion now, rage and deep ancient pain carrying him forward. For a moment they forgot about the grieving man and centered on Joel, determined to kill him for his transgressions.

Needless to say it didn't end well for them and he slowly and meticulously killed them one by one. And not in the most pleasant of ways. Almost all of them were unrecognizable, their faces beat so far in you could use their skulls as a bowl.

He returned to the man after that, tired and covered in thick layers of blood. At first the man recoiled out of fear and disgust, but part of him still refused to leave his daughter so he knelt back in, staring up at Joel as he just stood there staring down at the two.

It was a long awkward moment before anyone said anything, and the first and only one to speak ended up being Joel.

“I struggled for a long time with survivin'. I'm still...strugglin', and this...goddammit this wasn't the right thing for me to do...I was where you are once...and I can't imagine what she thinks of me now...if she can see me that is. Just...find somethin' worth living for...fighting for...don't go where I went...”

And that was that, he left after that and didn't look back, tried his damnedest to forget in fact. Then he met Tess and well...went against all his instincts and teamed up with her, let her in a bit even. He never would of if he had known...goddammit. Did everything he touch wither away?

 

He took in a sharp breath and slapped his hand over his eyes, berating himself for letting the thoughts come to him again. He wasn't even asleep this time, he willingly thought of them.

He turned his head to the side and glanced over to Ellie. She was again curled up as near to him as she dared, legs pulled up and arms wrapped around them, using her backpack as a pillow. He frowned at the sight, not happy that she had left the ragged blanket she used on the other side of the room.

He decided in this moment enough was enough, she was going to get drastically sick if she kept this up. Sure the old cabin they found was sound enough that it kept most of the biting cold out, but not nearly enough. So slowly, hesitantly, he reached a hand over and carefully shook her shoulder.

“Ellie? Hey, Ellie?”

He shook a little harder when she didn't respond, and only barely pulled his arm back quick enough as she pulled out her switch blade and sliced it through the air.

“Whoa! Whoa! Easy baby girl...just me...”

It took her a few moments for things to clarify in her mind, but when they did she quickly put her blade away and stammered an apology.

“No, hey. No need for that alright? Recon we're both a bit jumpy lately...”

It wasn't untrue. What happened with the cannibals shook them to the core, and they had been quick to vacate the area. But that hadn't been the end of it, they were going way out of the way to avoid human contact period, going deeper into the woods then was probably wise. But right now they feared other humans more than the infected, and the action did ease Ellie's mind a bit. Just a bit though.

They both had been scarred by the experience. She for everything she was forced to face alone...and for what happened to her...almost happened to her...

For him...it brought back memories of what he once was...though being a cannibal was thankfully not one of those things. But even worse than that...was seeing Ellie's face when he finally got to her. He'd never seen her so broken, so scared...even the infected hadn't elicited that sort of reaction from her. Of course it is scarier...when someone with clear control of their mind chooses the dark things they do. The infected weren't looking so bad right now.

“...um...what is it? What did you want?” She asked at last, seeing that he had retreated into his head and wasn't going to say anything without prodding.

“...you're gonna catch your death if you just sleep like that. Shoulda' brought your blanket kiddo.”

She huffed a bit. “I'm fine, not that cold.” Her lie was answered by a deep shiver that racked the entirety of her tiny frame.

“Not cold my ass...come here kiddo...”

She was hesitant at first, understanding that he was offering to share his own blanket with her. She knew she could trust him, there was nothing to worry about with him. But his sudden turn around in attitude threw her off and she wasn't sure how to react to it.

He seemed to pick up on it though and offered his best smile, which was only a slight upturn to the corner of one side of his mouth.

“I just...I can't stand seeing you like this baby girl...”

There it was again. He'd been saying it off and on since he found her in the fire, and she wasn't gonna lie, it felt good to hear. She just wasn't sure where it was coming from.  
When she saw his expression was changing to a more concerned one again, she quickly scrambled over so as to quash any sort of question that was building in him. She knew that, whatever this was, it was hard for him and making him second guess himself wouldn't help.

Joel let out a sigh of relief when she cuddled under the cover, and he did the best he could to tuck the ragged thing around her, making sure she had a good lot of it.

To him this was no different then when Sarah had a nightmare, and she'd come running to him. It didn't happen much after she'd passed ten but...the moment reminded him of it.

“When we gonna head out again?” She asked, trying to veer the subject off in another direction in case he tried to ask what she was dreaming of, though she was sure he knew. She just didn't want to talk about it.

“Thinking we can probably head out tomorrow...still not sure about full day travels though. Sorry kiddo, may take a bit longer to get to Salt Lake than I thought.”

“It's alright...I don't mind really. Don't really like traveling much in the fucking cold anyway.”

“Me neither. Damn hard to trek through the snow too. But regardless, we gotta keep moving.”

“I know.” She said as her voice grew quieter. At first he thought she was dozing off but, she wasn't. He could see her staring off at the far wall.

“...we're gonna manage kiddo...you and me. We'll find our feet again.”

She knew what he was eluding to, and she was still grateful he didn't outright say it. His rule may have been to be mum on most subjects, but she found over time that those got side stepped a bit when they started talking to each other in a sort of code. Speaking on the subject without actually mentioning the subject. It worked if you didn't want to talk about it, but still needed the comfort.

Problem is she found she wanted to know more about him as time went on, and she was willing to tell him more about herself as well. But she never tempted fate. She didn't want this new side of Joel to disappear.

Her ears perked and she glanced over at him as she realized he had started talking to her again.

“...Tommy...he uh...I remember this one time when we were younger, our parents set us up for one of them summer learning courses. Was on this ranch somewhere past Houston. He uh...he got the smart idea of trying to wrangle up one of the steers and see if he could last eight seconds or not.”

“...why the hell would he want to do something like that?

He chuckled a bit. “Basically, back in the day, there was these things called rodeos where you'd do all sorts of things. Try to ride bucking broncos or bulls, cutting steers and heifers. Ladies did barrel racing a lot, where you'd get your horse to cut real fast in and around the barrels.”

“...sounds fun? I guess. Whoa wait...cut steers? You had a competition for cutting up steers?”

Again he chuckled.”No I don't mean it that way. Cutting up steers means you'd have a group of 'em together in one area and you'd be on a horse and you'd pick one of 'em to cut off with your horse for a set period of time.”

“What was the point of that?”

“Well, people used to do these things called cattle drives, where they'd take the heard across vast open plains to different feeding grounds or slaughter...not done as much as it used to be way back when.”

She went quiet for a bit, all of her previous curiosity suddenly gone.

“Hey...hey what is it baby girl?”

“...horses...Callus...”

“Kiddo...”

“...stupid...David...asshole...” Her tiny frame began to shake again as the horrible memories again flooded forward.

“...hey...” He settled his fingers on her chin and turned her head so she was looking at him. “I know we don't talk about things, and that's my fault but, sometimes...when things real bad happen...you have to reflect on what didn't. What didn't happen Ellie...it didn't happen...”

She heard his voice hitch a bit, could see the pain on his face just thinking about it. She didn't respond to him though, not verbally anyway. She just nodded against his hand. It's true...things could have been far worse.

She relaxed a bit now, allowing herself to shift just a bit more closer to collect more of the heat off of Joel. She had to admit, it did feel a bit weird but...more in the way that she wasn't use to this sort of thing. Instinct told her Joel was just acting protective, and she sure as hell wasn't going to complain about this new turn of events.

And maybe it was all this that emboldened her a bit, for before thinking she let a question slip from her mouth.

“Why baby girl...? She regretted it as soon as she said it.

And for a time Joel was quiet, his breathing slowed a bit and she was afraid she had stepped over that thin line.

“...used to call Sarah that...” He finally said, surprising her not only by that answer, but by answering at all.

She looked at him, the question in her eyes but not spoken.

“...not yet kiddo...I can't go there yet...”

She nodded, excepting his answer and happy that in that answer, was a promise of someday. And if he was going to start sharing, then she would too.

Leaving it at that, she settled on her side, her back facing him and nestled her hands under her head, propping her cheek on them.

“Night Joel.”

“...night...baby girl.”

 

The following morning they packed their things up quietly, neither particularly looking forward to the days trek. But it had to be done and with time they were outside trekking through the deep snow.

For most of the morning the quiet continued, just the sound of birds chirping and snow falling occasionally from the tree branches. Ellie even saw a deer in one instance, but didn't take the time to dwell on it as it also brought back memories.

Joel tried his best to think of things to say, but since this new zone was entered between the two, he lost the ability to do so. Any time he did try he'd just ramble on about looking at some squirrel or pointing some other creature out. He'd only get grunts in response but at least it was something.

It was about mid-day when they came to a hill that overlooked a little town below. It was a chance to fill up on supplies, but also a chance to run into trouble. The thought caused both of them to be apprehensive about entering the town but, they knew they had to. They were running low and hadn't gathered much in the way of supplies since the cannibal town. And even then it was sparse because they had just wanted to get the hell out of there.

But they found they had little choice and so carefully made their way down the hill, slipping here and there as the incline grew steeper.

“I'm too old for this shit...” 

“In all honesty Joel, you're still too young to complain.”

“Is that a fact? And I am how old again? I'm practically a walking fossil. I'm the remnants of a...eh...Joel-asaurus.”

His attempt at a joke fell quite flat to Ellie.

“...keep trying Joel. But mess up with humor again and I'll pull out my pun book.”

“Christ, please don't.”

She cracked a smile, the first in a long while and it made him do the same. Progress was slow but, she was starting to get there.

Finally they reached the safety at the bottom of the hill and dusted the accumulated snow from the bottom of their legs.

“Whelp...here we are. Best get some shopping done and see what we can find.”

“...I'm gonna stick close to you if that's all right...?” Ellie said quietly, eyes falling to the ground.

“...you do whatever makes you feel comfortable kiddo.”

She nodded and followed closely behind him as they made their way down the snow covered road, heading into the small town. 

With the recent snowfall in the area it was hard to see how often people came into the town, or more importantly, how recently. The only footprints that were visible were animals, which probably was a good sign. Normally if something was wrong with the area it'd be relatively devoid of wildlife. But the tracks weren't all that fresh so, they couldn't completely go by that either.

“Come on kiddo. Old gas station over there, never know if people missed somethin'.”

She nodded, following closely as he made his way over.

The old station looked like any other building, falling apart and slowly being taken over by nature. It was set near a wooden fence that blocked the view of the alley beyond, old bushes and vines growing up to cover the sides and most likely the back as well.

Joel ran his hand over his beard as he took the sight in, never for a moment thinking that such a quiet scene would stay quiet.

He took a deep breath as he pushed forward, reaching the broken front doors and ducking through where glass had once been.

The place was dark, even with the light of day streaming in, and it smelled dank and moldy. There was only about four rows of shelving back to back and for the most part they lay empty, as one would expect after twenty years. But on rare occasions one might find a gem here and there so it was always worth looking.

But it became apparent pretty quickly that the place was pretty well ransacked and held very little in the way of anything useful. But one knew to check every nick and cranny, so Joel made his way behind the counter to see if anything fell out of sight.

“I'll...check the bathrooms back here...”

Joel poked his head up over the counter from where he was knelt. “You sure kiddo?”

“Yeah...it's alright. It's right there so...probably won't get in that much trouble.”

“Alright. Just be careful okay?”

“I will.”

He watched her for a few moments until she disappeared into the back where the restrooms resided. He couldn't help the tightening in his chest as a slight bit of worry engulfed him. He'd become a bit worried about letting her out of his sight after everything that had happened but, he knew for both their sakes he had to. It was the only way they'd both get over what had happened. So with a heavy sigh he ducked back behind the counter again, digging around to see if there was anything left to find.

Meanwhile in the back, Ellie carefully made her way down the short hallway. The first bathroom she ducked into was the Womens, out of instinct probably. The room was about as shabby as the front, paint on the walls peeling and toilet and sink smashed to pieces. The mirror was in no better shape as only pieces were still left glued to place. The floor itself was just a minefield of broken debris and animal feces.

She scrunched her face up, as some of it still smelled quite fresh.

Deciding there wasn't really anything useful in there, she ducked out and went into the Mens room next, seeing it in the same dire straights. The only difference being that something round and gray lay on what remained of the sink. As she walked over and picked it up, she realized it was one of the Firefly pendants.

“...guess some of them must have been through here...”

“Ellie! Find anything back there!?”

“No! Just some Firefly thing!”

Even at the distance they were from each other, she could hear him grunt distastefully. His views of them were very obviously never going to change.

She glanced at the pendant again, taking a moment to read the name inscribed on it.

“...Malcolm Briggs...hm...” She stuffed it in her bag then, just feeling some odd obligation to do so before returning to Joel.

“Find anything?”

“No.” He said as he walked up one of the isles. “Kinda expected as much though. These smaller places clear out real fast.”

“Next building then?”

“Next building.”

They made their way out of the gas station and checked a few of the smaller businesses surrounding it, finding little more than some nails, maybe a pair of scissors or two. But at least that was useful for making weapons anyway. 

They managed a little better luck as they found some canned food hidden in one of the houses, a good handful of them too. It was always finds like this that made Joel a little nervous, making him assume that maybe they were more someone else's stash rather than a rare find. And although he may not be above stealing from someone, the thought that someone might be hiding out here made him all the more nervous. It could just be a regular run of the mill survivor, or it could be a secondary stash by hunters. There was a larger city not far from there and he knew from experience that emergency stashes were often set up outside of the cities in case they had to bail for some reason. The proverbial bug out shelter.

In case that was a possibility, he didn't take the time to look at what was there and just quickly started to throw them in his backpack, Ellie following suit as she saw the concern on his face. He didn't want to spend anymore time in this town than he had to, he was just getting a worse feeling the longer they stayed there.

They still needed more supplies though so they had to keep looking, though it was at a far quicker pace. Something wasn't right, he could feel it. Whatever animals they had heard earlier had gone silent now, and he just wasn't sure if it was because of hunters or infected. Of course the quickly darkening skies could be another reason, as it looked like another snow storm wanted to move it's way in. Either way he honestly didn't want to waste too much more time and so ushered Ellie onwards quickly.

But quick as they may move, the flurries beat them to the punch. His anxiety grew as he started to realize they may end up being stuck in this town for at least a day or more, if the storm did in fact grow into a blizzard. They couldn't risk being caught out in the open, especially when he wasn't sure exactly where to find shelter outside of the town. 

He scratched at his beard as he weighed their options, stay or go? Which risk was worth it? Well obviously walking out into a blizzard was a fools quest, least in town there was shelter and enough choices to hide from either hunters or infected.

“...Joel?” Ellie questioned from behind him. His silence was becoming a growing cause of concern to her.

“...sky looks angry...and I recon it's too much of a risk if this snow gets worse. Afraid we might have to stay here for a bit kiddo.”

“...you sure that's a good idea?”

“We won't last in the wilderness if this becomes a blizzard. We'll just have to find a good place to hunker down, someplace we won't risk getting cornered in.”

“What about up there?” She asked, pointing to another hill that overlooked the town.

“...good choice I suppose, except it'll be a target for everyone else too I recon. But I doubt we have a choice, least there's room to move around.” He reasoned as he took in the sight.

It was another wilderness lodge, pretty much like most hotels out this far. It wasn't a huge one though, just a couple floors that most likely catered to rich dentists or something. He figured from the start this whole place survived on tourism, as most places were mom and pop shops and hunting and fishing retailers. Again, common for smaller towns out this far.

He kept his eyes on the log structure as they carefully made their way up the road that lead to it, the hill was just too steep to try to climb up the side of, and the last thing they needed was a few fractured bones to add to their list of issues.

As they reached the top, he heard Ellie whistle behind him.

“Wow, guess this place must have been something in it's day huh?”

“Most things were in their day, yeah. Recon this place was no different.”

He ran his eyes over the structure again, though he was mostly looking for any signs of trouble. The structure still looked pretty sound, minus the broken windows here and there and the few holes he could manage to see in the roof from his position below.

The building itself was surrounded by a few large pines on either side plus a few behind, just barely visible above the rooftop. And behind all that he could see another tall hill towering behind. Suddenly he felt the urge to add avalanches to his list of things to worry about.

“Actually...are we sure this is the best we've got? Can we maybe try something else?” Ellie asked, suddenly very unsure about this decision.

“I doubt we have much of a choice kiddo...it won't be like before, I won't let it be.”

“...okay, if you say so...”

She still sounded unsure but her trust for him was laced under all that as well. He wasn't lying, he'd be damned if he'd let something like that happen to her again.

“Well, come on kiddo, best get inside before it gets much worse out here.”

She nodded and followed him as he made his way quietly up the steps, careful to listen at the doors before ever so carefully pushing them open.

They both cringed as the hinges screeched throughout the depths of the foyer and for a moment neither of them moved, their eyes dodging back and forth for anything that might emerge from the side halls. But after a few moments nothing had happened, so they quietly made their way inside, Joel closing the doors behind them and securing it with a nearby couch.

When he turned around, he took stock of their situation. Straight on was a gray brick fireplace which was holding up well considering. Only a few of the bricks lay on the floor at it's base. Surrounding it were the remains of the furniture that once sat in a semi-circle around it. Now mostly just tattered remains of fabric, wood, and fluff. Behind all that was the front desk which contained broken pieces of glass bottles and various other things. Beyond that was a door half broken off it's hinges that most likely lead to the back office. On either side of the foyer, hallways lead left and right to the rooms on the lower floor while a set of stairs on the left lead to the upper level of rooms that went in an open circle around the foyer, two shorter corridors branching off left and right from that.

“Alright...first things first, lets clear the place, make sure we ain't got any surprises waitin' for us.”

Ellie nodded, still staying close to him as they proceeded to go about clearing the first floor. Everything appeared in order there so they slowly made their way up the stairs, scowling every time a stair would creak and groan.

But they made it to the top without incident and quickly went about clearing the rooms that circled the upper level. Again nothing was found and their attention soon turned to securing the building before searching out any supplies that might be scattered about.

Ellie took the risk of separating from him again, though her anxiety reached a whole new height as he was clear across the building securing the doors while she searched the area for supplies.

The rooms themselves didn't hold much, maybe an heirloom here and there left behind from a time when the evacuation orders were first given, though she couldn't help but think that out here knowledge of the outbreak came much later.

Ignoring the pictures and tattered clothing, she checked the bathrooms and closets, coming up with a few bottles of alcohol, some rags, and more things Joel could use for his tin can bombs.

She turned her attention to the kitchen on the lower level now, in a vain hope that some canned goods might still be there somewhere.

Surprisingly she did find some knives that were scattered around on the floor, so she was quick to stuff those in her bag, and amazingly she found some more canned goods in a pantry area.

Her mistake came when she decided to open the walk in freezer, not really assuming to find anything in there. Needless to say her yells echoed throughout the abandoned building and reached Joel's ears, causing him to run in a panic to her position.

When he finally found her, she was leaning heavy on the freezer door, almost like she was trying to hold something in.

“What?! What is it?!” He asked her as he ran over, grabbing her shoulders and turning her to him.

“Fucking smells like shit in there! There's a bunch of rotten meat!”

Joel was quiet for a moment before letting out a relieved sigh.

“Christ baby girl, you scared the hell out of me, thought you were in trouble or something.”

“My stomach will be if I have to smell that shit again.”

He chuckled a bit as he shook his head, releasing the grip he had on her shoulders. 

“...can't imagine there'd still be meat in there...”

She cut him off before he could finish his thought out loud.

“Beats me, I'm not a food expert. I see I eat. If it smells like death, I don't fucking touch it, that's all I need to know.”

She shrugged the event off, deciding to make her way out to the bar area that was attached to the dining hall, to search for rags and maybe bottles of alcohol.

Joel watched her leave, heart still beating heavy against his rib cage as the thought of her being in danger raged at his mind again. Ever since they found that damn food something had been eating at him, something was just off. Maybe it was just him being paranoid, just his...fathering side coming back in at full force and making him jump at shadows. But something was just telling him that he wasn't making shit up. Something was very wrong.

Not wanting to get a whiff of what Ellie did, he decided to forgo peeking into the freezer and instead made a check of the entire kitchen, looking for anything out of place for an abandoned building. Everything looked about as it should, till he reached the wall the freezer was on the other side of. He noticed a cord running along the floor towards a corner where a door was tucked well into, so out of view it'd be easily overlooked.

He made his way over and peeked inside, noticing the room was small but held one thing...a generator. It didn't look like it had been in use anytime recently though, and a quick once over of it proved him right. Popping the cap off he noticed the gas tank was empty, not even the slightest whiff of gasoline wafted from it. Regardless, someone had been using it at some point remotely recently, seeing as Ellie found rotten meat in the freezer. His heart quickened it's pace again as he ducked out of the room and made his way quickly back to the freezer, preparing himself as he threw the door open. Even with his arm secured over his nose and mouth, the stench made it's way through, making him gag and force back the rising vomit. The meat was far from fresh but not old either.

He quickly shoved the door closed and took a few deep breaths before rushing out to Ellie.

“Kiddo, cuttin' it short. We're quitin' this place.”

“Why? What's going on?”

“I checked the freezer...meats bad but it couldn't have been in there that long... It's wet in there, like they thawed sometime recent...the generator they had hooked up musta' quit.”

Her mind froze for a minute as she stared at him, going over all the possibilities in her mind.

“...do you think it's hunters? Or maybe just survivors?”

“Not all that sure at the moment kiddo, and I'm not sure I wanna risk it. We cut our losses, get the fuck outta here. We'll find another place to hole up, but we have got to go...”

He trailed off as they heard a thud in the hall, like something hitting the walls.

“The hell is that?” Ellie whispered, panic rising as she quickly but quietly pulled her gun.

“...not sure. Maybe a hunter...”

But he was forced to trail off again as he was proven very wrong. A very loud clicking sound emanated from the hall just outside of the dining area where they were.

“Shit...clicker...” Joel hissed. “I checked the whole goddamned place. How the hell did I miss it?”

“Joel...don't lodges have like...private lounges...bars or something...in the...”

“Basement...I forgot to check the fucking basement...”

They ducked down behind the bar as the clicker made it's way into the vast room, clicking and waving it's arms around as it searched for them.

“...shit...” Ellie said quietly, gripping the handle of her gun tighter.

Joel gave her a quick look, telling her silently it was going to be okay, before pointing out the doorway to her. She followed where his finger was pointing, understanding that he wanted her to watch the doorway. He then pointed to himself then over to the clicker. The fear rose in her, as it always did, when she realized he was going to kill the clicker. She really hated all the infected, but clickers sure topped that list. Well, them and maybe bloaters as well.

He settled his hand on her shoulder, giving it a light, reassuring squeeze as he made his way around her, not waiting for an answer in any way from her. He knew she worried, he just didn't want to see that look, didn't want to think how much it scared her every time he had to do this.

And so he pushed forward silently and slowly, making his way towards the meandering clicker.

Ellie watched him go, taking a shaky breath before doing her part in all this. She moved so her eye line was just over the top of the bar, gun at the ready in case infected came through the doorway. So far they were lucky, it appeared only the clicker had meandered it's way to them, and if they were really lucky, maybe the clicker was the only one in here.

She glanced over quickly, checking on Joel's progress. He was weaving around the tables and chairs that remained in the dining area, doing his best to make as little noise possible as he closed the distance between him and the clicker. She held her breath as she watched him pull out his shiv, hand hovering in the air for only a moment before he stood straight and plunged the blade into it's neck. The clicker let out a gurgled response as Joel pulled it to the floor, meaning to settle it down lightly. But the damned thing spasmed at the last moment and kicked it's leg out as it died, smashing into a chair and sending it into the table causing a loud bang to resound throughout the dining hall. 

For a moment time seemed to stand still, there was no sound, no thought even as the two locked eyes with each other, listening for any approaching sounds.

And then it came, with the disturbing sound of thunder as many feet stampeded the floor, heading in their direction. Before long they burst through the doorway, hissing and growling as they stopped only for a moment to lock eyes on their prey. The group wasn't all that large, but more than enough to cause the two of them some mighty big problems. The group was a mixture of stalkers and runners, and all of them were screeching in unison, making the sound unbearable in the vast room. They had zeroed in on them, and their screeches grew louder as they threw themselves forward, breaking off into two groups as one set settled on Joel and the other on Ellie.

“Ellie! Ellie run goddammit!” He yelled as he motioned with one of his hands, pointing out the doorway at the other end of the room. She took his cue as she watched him pull out his 9mm, knowing he was going to cover her retreat.

She couldn't let herself hesitate though, even if the thought of leaving him behind scared her to death, but he'd fair better if he didn't have to keep an eye on her as well, so she quickly bolted from behind the bar. The stalkers and some of the runners that had been heading in her direction smashed into the bar behind her, screeching as she escaped their grasp. But she didn't look back, she knew they had already recovered and were chasing after her.

She ran for the other exit, trying not to look as she heard Joel fire off a few shots behind her, his grunts telling her he more than likely was fighting off one of the infected.

Not being able to leave him like that, she took the chance to stop and swerve around, catching sight of the infected closing in on her, and the runner Joel was just barely holding off with his arm. She took a breath and held it, steadying herself before firing. The shot took the runner down right away, earning her a confused but grateful look from Joel, before it turned to one of panic. The group chasing her had closed in and she acted just quick enough to take the two in front down before bolting from the room.

She slid around the corner and pushed forward down the hall, hearing the other infected closing in on her heels. Her lungs burned as she pushed herself as hard as she could, emerging from the hallway and back into the front foyer. She glanced around quickly, considering her options before choosing the high ground and rushing up the stairs. She knew she might be cornering herself but she'd have a better view in case there was more infected than the ones after them at the moment, along with the high ground to pick them off before they could reach her.

She took the stairs three at a time, trying to gain ground on the infected so she could put enough space between her and them to be able to set up to take them out. It worked and she reached the top while the small group was still making their way up the stairs.

She steadied her breathing again as she took aim, popping off the first two pretty easily. The last one stumbled over the corpses as it tried to reach her, and she backed up to put a bit more distance between them before taking her final shot. But she ended up stumbling over some busted chairs behind her, causing her to thud hard to the floor, the gun sliding away from her.

“Shit! No!”

She tried to shuffle back to her feet, seeing the final infected sprinting towards her. She knew she wouldn't be able to fight it off, it was just too strong for her, so at best she had to try to hold it off. And so she grabbed at one of the busted chair legs as she made her way to her feet, turning just in time for it to catch the infected in the throat. She gripped the leg at both ends, forcing it forward as hard as she could to keep it's snapping jaws away from her. The impact of it running into her though caused her to stumble backwards, and she now was leaned half way over the banister that ran around the length of the upper floor. Her arms were tiring and her back screamed at her as it was bent to an almost unnatural position as the infected pushed more of it's weight on her. She was now regretting not just turning the leg around and stabbing it in the head. But it was too late for that now, it was only a matter of time.

And then a shot rang out, hitting the infected in the head. Ellie grunted and quickly shoved it off her, rolling so her back was off the banister now and she instead leaned forward over it.

Below she could see Joel, hunting rifle still raised as his hands very visibly shook slightly. He almost didn't make it and he knew it. He almost lost her, again.  
But there was no time to celebrate as Ellie saw an infected running at him from the hallway.

“Joel! Behind you!”

He barely had time to react before it collided with him, knocking the rifle he had put up in defense, from his arms. Both crashed hard to the floor and rolled away from each other, the infected quite a bit more quick in getting up.

Up above Ellie quickly pushed herself from the banister, rushing around trying to find where her gun had slid off to. Joel was in trouble, and she still wasn't sure how many infected were in the building. He wouldn't last if more showed up now. She could hear him struggling below, could tell he was really having a tough time with it. She knew he still had some pain from his injury, even if he tried to hide it from her, so it no doubt was causing him problems now. She had to hurry.

Below, the infected had Joel pushed up against the stone framework of the fireplace, Joel only barely keeping it's head held away from him. He used what little strength he had left to force it back till he had managed to shove it off of him, quickly punching it a few times before grabbing the back of it's head and smashing it into the fireplace till it's head exploded into mush.

He only barely recovered from that, still breathing quite heavy as he heard the screech from behind him. Of course there was more. Why wouldn't there be?

He turned just in time to see another stalker running for him. “Oh fuck...” 

He tried to ready himself best he could, but his abdomen was burning and his arms felt like lead weights. If that thing collided with him then he was going to go down hard.

His mind reacted slowly as he heard a wiz as the air next to his ear was disturbed, and watched as blood burst front the front of the stalkers head. He kept his eyes locked on it as he saw two more explosions of blood shoot from it's head before it fell to the floor, twitching before it finally ceased to exist.

Slowly he turned around, seeing Ellie standing behind him with the gun still raised.

“Yeah...that's right...fuck you ugly...”

He let out a long ragged breath before heading over to her, slowly lowering the gun in her hand as he knelt before her.

“You don't know...how much I fought with givin' you a gun...but I'm sure as hell glad I did...”

“You're welcome...” She said, unable to hide the shaking in her voice as she slipped the safety on and slipped the gun back behind her.

Joel wiped away the few tears that had started to streak down her face, unbeknownst to her apparently by her reaction, before pulling her into a hug.

“Thank you baby girl...you did real good...”

The moment didn't last long though as screeches and clicks emanated from the hallway that lead back to the dining hall.

“Fuck sake. This place is infested.”

“Yup. And we ain't about to wait around any longer to greet 'em, lets get outta here.”

She nodded as he grabbed the hunting rifle before rushing over to the front doors, quickly pulling the couch away and yanking them open, letting her go first before he rushed out. He pulled the doors shut, looking around for anything to hold them shut with.

Ellie soon came to the rescue, having found a thick metal pipe that Joel quickly jammed through the handles, preventing the doors from being pulled open. And just in time too as the infected on the other side slammed into the doors.

“New rule...no more fucking lodges...they're nothing but bad luck.” Ellie said as she bent over, out of breath.

“Yeah. Ain't gonna complain with you on that one.”

“So now what?”

“Guess we got no choice, we gotta find another place. Storms not too bad yet, but I doubt we could find shelter outside of town before it worsens.”

She nodded and followed him as he quickly made his way down the steps. They couldn't quit this place soon enough.

“I shoulda known really.” He started as they reached the bottom of the hill and entered back into the small town below.

“Known what?”

“I knew this setup, I knew they had a second setup here. Figured it when we found that food earlier.”

“So you do think it was hunters...do hunters usually have two separate operations like this?”

“Some do. Especially if you have a large group, hard to feed them all. And it's easier to trick tourists with smaller towns, since most get smart enough to skip the larger cities.”

“...so...uh...guess they ran into trouble then. Being isolated like this, they probably couldn't get help from their buddies in the big city when the infected came.”

“That's how I see it. With all the storms they can't check on 'em as regularly. To hell with 'em all though. Ain't no one gonna miss em.”

“You're right there. So I assume our best bet is to avoid the city coming up then huh?”

“Oh yeah. Ain't livin' through another Pittsburgh again...”

There was a long silence after that, both stuck in their memories of that terrible point in time. Mostly thinking about poor Henry and Sam. So Joel was surprised when he heard Ellie speak up.

“Hey Joel?”

“Hm?”

“Did you hear about the guy who's whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.”

He turned his head to look over his shoulder, never even realizing she had pulled that dumb book out again. He raised a brow before looking ahead again. “Think you used that one already.”

“Did I?”

“Think so.”

“Well shit.”

It was quiet for a bit as Ellie thumbed through the pages, looking for one she may have not used yet.

Joel mulled over things ahead of her, before finally opening his mouth.  
“...stealing someones coffee is called mugging...”

She looked up at him from her book, quirking a brow. “Did you just make a pun?”

“...recon I did.”

“...and it's about coffee? Why am I not surprised?”

“...I miss coffee...”

She chuckled a bit as she slipped the book back into her bag, moving up so she was walking beside him. “Drinking too much coffee can cause a latte problems.”

This time it was his turn to chuckle. “Heh, you know, it sure can.”

He looked up as the snow started to fall at a quicker pace as the wind began to pick up. “We best hurry up and find a new shelter. Storms moving in faster now.”

“Aye aye captain.”

He chuckled again as he lead her quietly through the town, finding himself oddly happier than before, even with the infected trying to ruin things. They had a ways to go towards getting better but, time at least for now seemed to be on their side.

**Author's Note:**

> I replayed the game again, so this is again taking up my life. >>
> 
> I do kinda wish I knew what happened with Joel's wife, just really curious about that but, oh well. Guess that's just left up to all of us huh?


End file.
